The stream of tough topics for parents to explain can feel unending: social unrest, hate crimes, natural disasters … the pandemic. Many children and teens have struggled to process what they see at school, in their neighborhoods and on the news.
The Eirhart family confronts this challenge every Tuesday evening at their home in Butler, Pennsylvania.
“My parents make it easy for me to express my feelings,” said Jocelyn Eirhart, 13, of this weekly family discussion hour. “I don’t feel interrogated. It’s not a Q&A. It’s just a time to say what’s on my mind.” Her brother, Logan, 15, agrees. “It’s not easy to just bring up something you want to talk to your parents about. This is a time when there’s no pressure.”
The Eirhart parents, Justin and Jennifer, feel that communication is now more important than ever, with so many children suffering from mental health issues during the pandemic. “The last couple of years have been hard on everyone, especially children,” said Jennifer. “Kids are missing major milestones in life. Friends aren’t just playmates. They are emotional connections, and they are missing that. It’s important to address how they are feeling and what can help.”
And that’s exactly the opportunity their weekly discussions provide. “We discuss topics like friendships, making wise use of our time, and the appropriate use of social media and electronic devices, all factors that have been known to affect mental health,” explained Justin.
In an ever-changing and challenging world, experts recommend regular family discussions to help young ones build resilience.
“Good communication is essential for a child’s survival in this world,” said James Wright, a California-based family counselor and conflict resolution mediator. “Why not have a family discussion once a week and talk about what’s going on in your lives?”
The Eirharts are not alone in holding to a set time to have family discussions. For nearly two decades, families of Jehovah’s Witnesses like theirs around the world have been encouraged to make “family worship” an uninterrupted weekly routine.
“For many of our families, their weekly discussions are among the most important hours of the week,” said Robert Hendriks, U.S. spokesman for Jehovah’s Witnesses. “It has brought thousands of our families closer together and helped children feel safe and loved.”
In hurricane-pummeled New Orleans, the Andrades address safety concerns with their two sons during their regular family worship night.
“On one of our family nights, we were able to put our emergency go bags together and practice what we would do if we were to get separated during a natural disaster,” said mom Ashley Andrade, who safely evacuated with her family before Hurricane Ida uprooted trees and downed power lines on their street.
Her family strengthened this routine in 2009 when Jehovah’s Witnesses reduced their midweek meetings from two to one, freeing up an evening each week for families to enjoy such time together.
“Meeting in large groups for worship is a Bible command, but the Bible also tells parents to make time to talk with their kids,” said Hendriks. “The change to our weekly meetings helped families to prioritize unhurried Bible discussions tailored to their needs.”
For the Cariagas of Lomita, California, their weekly discussion provided a time to promptly address racism when their three girls saw news reports about hate crimes targeting their Asian community.
“The articles on jw.org about prejudice and the video about anxiety were really helpful,” said mom Lorrie Cariaga, referencing free resources on the official website of Jehovah’s Witnesses, where they often turn for practical and scriptural solutions to family concerns.
Along with serious topics, the Cariagas mix in singing, dramatic performances, and hiking in their family worship together. “Family time is like an open space; it’s relaxed, and it’s always fun,” said Sophie, 14.
Family nights forged something special for the Eirharts too. “Having this weekly time makes us a stronger family unit, and strong families make strong communities,” said Justin.
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